dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
