belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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