guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
