I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize
