This is not my ceiling
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Randomize
