They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
