I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize