wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize