just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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