I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
