So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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