it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize