And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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