they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I pour the whiskey from now on
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