Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Randomize
