You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
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