A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
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