I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
