I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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