I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
