Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize