In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize