After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize
