my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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