"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Randomize
