and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Randomize
