Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Too much gin, very little bucket
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
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