D3 body, D1 cock
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
