Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
