Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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