the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Randomize
