let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I think I sprained my soul last night
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
