Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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