You really coming over, don't trick.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
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