i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
