if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
