i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I am spending my child support on dildos
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
he quoted the bible to break up with me
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Drunk is a universal language darling
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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