the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
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