I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
either way he was missing a nipple.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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