So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
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