There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Randomize
