According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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