If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I think my moral compass just broke
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