so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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