Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize