I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize