You really coming over, don't trick.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize