life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
