D3 body, D1 cock
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
no more duck duck goose at the bar
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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