Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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