Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
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